Sunday, February 14, 2010

More Olympic Spirit

I swear, I won't obsess about the Olympics ceaselessly. But I can't help myself but comment on the Dutch Olympic champion 5,000 m speed skating gold medalist, Sven Kramer.

This is precisely why I'm an occasional consumer-fan of speed skating. If a sport requires you to be covered neck to toe, at least make it so skin tight that we can tell if you're circumcised. 6'1" (isn't that short for the Dutch?), 23 year old stunner Sven was incredible to watch yesterday. Those tree trunk thighs pumping smoothly as his notable package was pressed side to side with each stride... I was hypnotized.
This pic is from a different competition, but offers another pleasing view of the wonders of speed skating gear. I could seriously get into some gear fetish with Sven packed into his cat suit like that!

Apparently, Sven is a promoter of bread products back at home. I love that the ad boys had the wisdom to oil Sven up for this shot. Yeah, bread... that's what this shot is selling.

Less oil, more bread in this shot. The sly smile on his face here is filling me with the Olympic spirit. I'd like tickets to the after-party where dimpled-face Canadian Denny Morrison, frustrated with his 18th place finish, lures Sven on the back patio and pearl harbors him from behind. Some speed skater on speed skater crotch abuse is surely in order. I'm not sure who would win, but bones could surely be snapped if the tussle turned to scissors.

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