Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Miles Ahead

Today I'm offering another dish of sloppy seconds from Joe over at Ringside at Skull Island. Joe's been on the ball and out of the gates so fast that I haven't kept up with the fantastic materials he's been reviewing lately. By my count, I've already mixed at least three metaphors in the first two sentences of this post, so no more beating around the bush. Let's talk about the wonders that are Cody Nelson's performance against Chris Cox over at Rock Hard Wrestling.


Again, see Joe for the definitive review. I'll just linger around the edges here. To start with, haven't I seen that long, lanky tall drink of water that is Chris Cox before? Why yes, indeed. BG East's Christian Taylor is riding the gravy train of cross-promotional competition now. And speaking of riding, the juxtaposition of Cody's absolutely fantastic muscle ass and Chris' impressively stuffed crotch is highly provocative. The fact that both boys keep tugging at their trunks throughout the match makes me want to give the head costumer at RHW an award.



It seems worth noting that BG East has never put Christian's talents in the ring before, so at the very least, we're seeing him in a new context. It also seems worth noting that RHW has never, ever appeared to be about to show us the skin and the explicit homoeroticism of, say, Christian's self-titled appearance against Billy Lodi in Taylor's Twinks. In a world of more and more recycling, I'm willing to give some slack when the talent is getting repackaged in such a way that we actually see something new.


And frankly, 9 times out of 10 my kink is tweaked more by wrestling in the ring than in any other setting (which probably accounts for me only slowing warming to Thunder's Arena and yet wearing rose-colored glasses and full of hope and promise for the development of RHW). So Christian Taylor as Chris Cox climbing into the high definition ring for RHW is already revving my engine in a new way.


Cody Nelson once again awes. As Joe points out, Cody is starting to look like a seasoned wrestler. He takes possession of this match immediately, launching an ominous assault that leaves Chris not quite clear on what end is up. Again, I'm just a weak echo of Joe's point that Cody is selling a strike better and better all the time. Now, if he'd just wrap those gargantuan thighs of his around some poor hunk's skull and squeeze long and hard, for, let's say, a good 60 seconds of skull crushing torture, he'd be golden. Cody goes to the stomps and punches a little too often for me. Chris has some better pacing and variety of holds and blows here to keep things fresh. A pummeling has it's delights, but surely it's called Rock Hard Wrestling for a reason.


I'm fascinated to know the backstory behind Cody's determined taunts. "How's that feel, huh?" he demands as he nearly snaps Chris in half in a Boston Crab. "How's that feel, getting beat!? You're buddy's not here. You're buddy's not here to help you out this time... come on, Chris, where's your buddy!?... Come on, twig!" So the "twig" taunt is obvious. Surely one of Cody's upper thighs is as thick as Chris' waist. But who's the buddy? I haven't seen Chris' first RHW match, and clearly I've missed some key elements of the drama, damn it. You KNOW that I love the drama!


Fans of musclemen armpits will delight in some of the early punishment Chris dishes out to Cody, as will fans of hair pulling, as Chris persistently throughout the bout drags the big man to his feet by a fist full. I also give Chris extra credit for working in a couple of subtle gropes of Cody's powerful glutes.


Finally, I'll just offer an example of the point that Joe makes so well. Cody's salesmanship is simply hot. He's taunting and humiliating Chris relentlessly. When he takes the second fall with an abdominal stretch as he beats his fist into Chris' gut, he finally drops Chris in a heap and steps on him with disgust. Then he looks up to the camera with a sigh and subtle smirk, pumping out a single bicep. It's as if he's checking off his list of chores for the day. Make the bed. Feed the dog. Take out the trash. Beat Chris into a blithering, helpless heap. Check.



Cody, like RHW, has come  along way in the past year or so, and I for one am pleased to have been on the journey with him. He still hasn't figured out what all he can do with those gorgeous, big muscles of his, but he's learning. He's learning...

2 comments:

  1. Thanks for the plug. You are a generous man, Bard. And I'm amused by your mixed metaphors ... or, like mine so often, pureed.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I thought you'd enjoy the trainwreck of my metaphors, Joe.

    ReplyDelete

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