Monday, May 30, 2011

Name That Cock

Memorial Day weekend has been tough on me.  I enjoy visiting family, but I'm inevitably stuffed with junk food, bored to tears with stories about my infinite nieces and nephews, and deprived of high speed internet. Hell, I tell you. This week's quiz was ready to publish yesterday, but the only internet access I had either couldn't handle the data-transfer of these five pics, or it just couldn't swallow these close-ups of five big, beautiful cocks. Now that I'm reconnected to the real world, here's this week's quiz, our second edition of Name That Cock. See if you can identify the homoerotic wrestlers equipped with these impressive tools...

Cock #1:
5'10", 160 pounds, ever-ready hard-on, 14 homoerotic wrestling matches that I know of, only 2 of which failed to feature unobstructed views of his lead pipe. Here, he's tied up and getting his trunks pulled so tight that his throbbing cock looks like it's getting choked into submission by his waistband.

Cock #2:
5'11", 173 pounds, this is top shelf porn-quality cock. I can put my hands on five matches featuring this muscle stud, the most recent one (pictured here) putting him over .500. 

Cock #3:
5'10, 174 pounds, a considerable amount of that weight swinging between his legs. He taped around 16 homoerotic wrestling matches, half of which have him unleashing this boa constrictor on his awe-struck opponents, hypnotized by its ponderous pendulum swing. While his tag-team matches are my favorite examples of his work, the match pictured here is a 1-on-1 with another muscle hunk who, normally, would have been able to claim the most awesome cock in the ring. This time, however, his martial arts, ridiculous good looks, and "quarter pounder" were no match for the "whole Big Mac" pinning him to his back in the middle of the ring.

Cock #4:
Another top-shelf porn presence, this 6'1" 245 pound musclebound fuck freak is probably known to most from his porn work that didn't involve wrestling (though mash-ups of his wrestling seem to be awfully popular in some corners of the globe lately). You can get full credit for naming either of his stage names, but you'll get extra credit for naming both. Here he has his bleach blond opponent helpless in a torture rack in possibly the least creatively named product ever.

Cock #5:
6'1", 170 pounds of aptly named homoerotic wrestling icon. This homoerotic wrestler is always seamless in his devastating, all-in, fantastically focused sadistic wrestling assault and the inevitable sexual domination that must follow. Here, he's beaten his lucky/unlucky opponent (who's stock continues to steadily rise with me) with every inch of his body, culminating in a cock-whipping with the punk's nose crushed beneath his balls.

Best of luck to you, boys. I hope you were able to celebrate the Memorial Day weekend with plenty of sweet, hard, beautiful cocks!

3 comments:

  1. "Infinite nieces and nephews" made me laugh. I guess it's just the world's way of making sure that even people who don't like/want kids can't entirely escape putting up with them.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1. Dino Serra
    2. I think it's Race Cooper
    3. Jose
    4. Billy Herrington
    5. Kid Viscious

    ReplyDelete
  3. Woo-hoo, jobberinnyc! You're awesome! Since you're clearly playing this game at an expert level, can you name the opponents for the matches from which these pics came?

    ReplyDelete

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