Saturday, December 24, 2011

Santa Baby

For those anticipating the arrival of a particular gift-bearing sugar daddy, I hope you get to check a whole lot of excellent items off of your wish list this evening. Knowing that someone purchased Hugh Jackman's sweaty t-shirt gives me hope for a sweet, musky surprise in my stocking. And if we're talking wishes, I've got my fingers crossed for one of the following Santas to appear, like magic, in my living room to deliver the goods. I'll clear some floor space for a wrestling mat, just in case.  Now the real challenge is deciding which of these hunky Santas I'm wishing for most...

Prettyboy Santa
Prettyboy Santa here is making me feel awfully naughty and nice at the same time! Look at those massive shoulders! Full nelson, anyone?
Homicidal Santa
Goldberg as Ho-Ho Homicidal Santa in a movie that is so epically bad that it almost (but not quite) circles back around to become a cult classic... so wrong. But Santa as a musclebound heel? Now that could work...

Bright-Eyed Santa
 Bright-Eyed Santa here with a couple days of scruff is ready to get pinned. Whoever Santa didn't get to visit before he showed up at my place would be shit out of luck, because this Santa stud isn't going anywhere!

Surly Santa
 Surly Santa hunk here looks like he's ready to shed the "jolly" and open up a can of whoop ass. Let me just clarify, I've been terribly, terribly naughty this year, Santa. Teach me a lesson, muscle man!

Naked Santa
This Santa appears ready for a naked wrestling romp, which makes him rise up my wish list of which Santa I'm hoping for most of all. The dopey, dimpled grin suggests that this bare Santa may be destined to be my jobber boy. If I learned anything this year, Lon Dumont taught me that you can't be too smiley and still manage to be a convincing heel.

Punk-ass Santa
 This Punk-ass Santa has got something to prove, and I, for one, would be happy to crush his ego just as devastatingly as I crush his gym bunny body.

Pouty Santa (aka, Flamer Santa)
 Pouty Santa (aka, Sagger Santa) at first glance strikes me as too pretty end up anywhere other than under foot. However, as I consider a little longer, I'm getting a hit of a boa-brandishing flamer with the heartless core of a nasty heel. If this is the Santa that shows up fireside this evening, I could very well find myself tied up with that boa and tormented humiliatingly. Wish fulfilled!

Suspender Santa
 However, I think this is the Santa that's top on my wish list, because I just can't decide whether he'd be destined to rack me across his broad, beautiful shoulders, or whether I'd be dragging him across the floor by that handy red-tie.  I can picture Suspender Santa on either end of the stick. So I have no idea who'd end up on top, and that's what makes him my fondest wish for a hunky, shirtless Santa to visit me for a long, long winter's night!

On behalf of all the homoerotic wrestling Santa hunks and me, I hope this is a happy night for all the friends and fans of neverland!

2 comments:

  1. That last Santa is Jimmy Clabots from Showtimes's 'Gigolos'

    ReplyDelete
  2. Choosing is always so difficult! I'm very indecisive. First two and Naked Santa?

    ReplyDelete

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