Monday, February 13, 2012

Wrestling Romance

Valentines Day typically leaves me cold.  Rampant, conspicuous displays of heterosexual romance get on my nerves. But I feel like reclaiming the day for myself this year. One of my fondest devices in homoerotic wrestling is the tender turn after a seriously nasty, bitter battle. When the winner claims his prize and both wrestlers are as enthusiastic about carnal delights as corporal punishment, I'm seriously sold.  Thumbing through the file cabinet in my head (augmented by the search function in my favorite homoerotic wrestling sites), I'm coming up with a sadly short list of my top tender moments in homoerotic wrestling. It's a satisfying jaunt down memory lane, however. So for this month's reader's poll, let me just ask you: which romantic wrestling pair should be crowned Mr. and Mr. Valentines Day Wrestling Couple of 2012?

Art Imitating Life: Christian Taylor and Skip Vance
Skip Vance and Christian Taylor get the pole position in this race to the climax, because Skip has let it be known through his Facebook page that he and Christian are, in real life, long-time lovers. This sent me (and at least one reader I've heard from) scurrying back to their ferocious mat room battle in Sexy Showdown 6: Sexier to reconsider the nasty humiliation and pain that these two hot, hard, lean grapplers pour out onto each other before settling in for some naked, sweaty, tender tongue wrestling. These boys get more hot and bothered the meaner the action turns, making me picture infinite homoerotic wrestling scenarios in the Taylor/Vance household. These two sweat soaked boys with their crotches grinding and their lips hovering over each other could totally redeem Valentines Day for me. How about you?
Teasing Done: Rafael Valmor and Blaine Janus
I have no idea what Rafael Valmor and Blaine Janus' relationship is off the mat, but on the mat in Undagear 18, it was mind-blowing. Other things blew for me as well, and in no small part it was due to the gorgeous tension that Rafael builds by adamantly refusing to let Blaine kiss him throughout their increasingly amorous mat battle. You can just about see Blaine's balls turn blue inside his tight red trunks as he wrings another sweat-soaked submission out of the Latin lover and leans in to taste victory, only to be shoved away as the brown-eyed boy refuses to give it away for free. Butts get squeezed with rising passion. The submissions get uglier. And once Blaine is just finally wasted with sexy Rafael stretched out on top of him, the curly haired adonis slaps on that priceless kiss on nobody's but his own terms. Now that's a love story worthy of Shakespeare! And it's also an entirely convincing option for Rafael and Blaine to be the 2012 Mr. and Mr. Valentines Day Wrestling Couple.

Sure Thing: Marc Rion and Mitch Colby
On a completely different end of the spectrum (at least when it comes to bodies), I'm also strongly drawn to the outrageously hot sexual tension that rages like a wildfire from the first second Mitch Colby  steps onto the mat with one-hit-wonder Marc Rion as the climax (and I mean climax!) of Mitch's Wrestler Spotlight.  Holy shit, their bodies are both off the charts, and I don't care how good of actors they are, there's some genuine lust slapped down all over their naked bodies! They're so hot for one another, in fact, that the wrestling is nearly tossed out the window, which would be a cardinal sin in my book. Happily, they manage to get some hot, dominating wrestling in on top of other cardinal sins, earning my profound pleasure and a competitive bid to be poster boys for my Valentines Day redux.

Just can't hide it: Jared Curzon and Gabriel Ross
Boy toy Gabriel Ross also sometimes dances just this side of forgetting the wrestling in my wrestling fare. But he and Jared Curzon strike such a heart-melting scene in their Motel Madness UK 5 tussle! Again, they're raging hot for one another from go, and they're so fucking adorable as to be nearly too sweet to swallow. Get a load of Jared's luscious ass and monster cock, however, and you'll reconsider any reluctance to swallow that you might have had. The back and forth between passionate embrace and bearhug makes my heart (and other parts of my anatomy) pound, and I would have no trouble seeing them as the redeeming Valentine's Day for homoerotic wrestling fans.

Signed, Sealed, Delivered: Sean Patrick and Bud Orton
It's hard to make a list of wrestling matches with over the top sexual tension turned tender without seeing Sean Patrick show up at least once. The infamous "Kisser" of classic BG East days, Sean slapped his lips on his opponents' time after time, clearly turned on by the intimacy of domination wrestling. Pretty much anything on Sean's wrestling resume could qualify, but I think this shot of him from Sexy Showdown 4 making out with always amorous Bud Orton while simultaneously locking him up tight in an ass-up, body contorting, completely humiliating spladle seems like it could be the iconic image of the erotic component of homoerotic wrestling. Oh yeah, sweat pours off of them like Niagra falls and the wrestling is fucking fierce! How do you feel about Sean and Bud being Mr. and Mr. Valentine around here?
Three's Company: Shane McCall, Brooklyn Bodywrecker
and Liam Ryan
Another image that I've remarked on many times on this blog is the victory celebration with tag team partners Shane McCall and Brooklyn Bodywrecker sucking face in Tag Team Torture 2 while one half of the losing team, sexy little Liam Ryan, sucks on Shane's cock through his trunks. If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, this story has GOT to be repeated, because there's just nothing sexier than tag team partners/lovers battling for domination and getting more and more aroused as they pick to pieces and utterly humiliate their losing opponents (who are also lovers)! And eroticism in the ring is at least 20 times hotter than it is anywhere else, as far as I'm concerned! Maybe it's not fair, but this pic proves the delightful possibility that the hottest homoerotic wrestling couple could easily be a threesome (or more)!  Shane, BBW and Liam get my nod as connecting all the dots between tender loving and hard slamming homoerotic wrestling.


Masks and Melting: The Enforcer and Blueboy

Again in the ring, the stunning image from Masked Mayhem 4 of Blueboy making big, bad bruiser Enforcer melt in the corner as he nibbles on his lips and prominent chin turns... me... ON! Two gorgeous bodies, masked in mystery and coated in sweat are a formula for arousing wrestling. But with Blueboy toying with the big heel's nipple and leaning in close, crotch to crotch and tasting the hunky heel's mouth, I'm totally turned into a blubbering romantic fool. Maybe Mr. and Mr. Valentines Day Wrestling Couple 2012 are hot, horny masked men?

Hurt So Good: Cruze/Jose and Patrick/Sean

Like I said, it's hard not to have at least one Sean Patrick match on a list like this, and so here's a second (with another recurring nominee).  I think of this as another iconic image in homoerotic wrestling from Tag Team Torture 1, with Jose and Cruze heaping agony and humiliation onto Sean and Patrick Donovan in the closing moments of their incredibly sexy victory. Stripped naked, locked into mirror image camel clutches and forced to kiss in the middle of the ring, Patrick and Sean prove that the erotic heat doesn't have to come from opposite sides of the confrontation. Perhaps this is the most iconic image of homoerotic wrestling passion, and the winning "couple" is, in this case, a foursome of hot, horny, hung hunks with bodies locked together in gorgeous symmetry and power and complete domination.

So who do you think should get the nod? You only get one vote. Of course, these are only the nominees that came to my mind. You may have another set of favorites to suggest. So vote in the right margin, and if you select "other," then name your wrestling picks for who should be Mr. and Mr. Valentines Day Wrestling Couple 2012.

4 comments:

  1. Great post! It was a tough choice, as all of them are hot. I loved seeing two masked men kissing and I also enjoyed the older matches with Shane/BBW and the tag teams. However, you swayed me when you posted that Skip and Christian are a real couple, so in the spirit of appropriating Valentine's Day, they got my vote.

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  2. I'll have to add in my vote for Skip and Christian as well now knowing that they're a real life couple... had I not known that I would say the chemistry between Mike Martin and Christian was quite electric in their match.

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  3. Gotta go with the masks...SO hot!

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  4. Lots of hot contenders here and some very strong runners-up like that incredible hotel-wrestle-romp of Gabriel and Jared (who were also a couple at the time), and my own personal memories of Sean Patrick's steamy blend of punishment and passion... but I had to go with my heart rather than my dick and so I voted for Christian and Skip, two sweethearts - in every sense of the word.

    Kid Leopard

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