Friday, May 31, 2013

Summertime and the Livin' Is Easy

Like fresh picked berries and crotch watching at the beach, BG East's Summer Sizzler's releases have become a seasonal treat for me.  I'm a little dizzy from the initial overdose I just subjected myself to, scoping out the preview pics that are part of catalog 99.1, just released.

Boyfriend jobbers Skip and Christian make me think it's not all bad getting crushed by Morgan Cruise.
Making my eyes water the hardest are the initial shots of Tag Team Torture 16: Boyfriend Beatdown, featuring the combo I've been bitching and moaning in anticipation of for years.  Skip Vance and his  real life boyfriend (and former HWOTM) Christian Taylor climb into the ring together for a 2-on-1 battle against heel-risen Morgan Cruise.  Holy shit, this looks insanely hot.  This looks like it's heading in all the right directions, and I'm a little breathless in anticipation.

Chace LaChance and Braden Charron are RIPPED! 
Speaking of breathless, shocking me just a little are the preview pics of the "Bonus Match" (for ordering all of the Summer Sizzlers) featuring Braden Charron and Chace LaChance both appearing to have physically peaked for the season at precisely the same moment that they climbed into the ring together.  I may have seen Braden this ripped... possibly, but holy hell, I have never seen Chace as put together as this. Fuck. Me. Please.

Who's Got Whom? Eli Black or Cameron Matthews? 
Mat Hunks 9 is a stand-alone compilation that delivers a pretty perfect 8-pack selection of thirst-quenching hunks such as I'm not sure I've seen all on one DVD before.  3-time HWOTM Eli Black looks like he's got his hands full with former HWOTM Cameron Matthews.  This is a fascinating pairing, I think, and Cameron's showmanship combined with Eli's intensity seems like a formula for either disaster or perfection.  I'm voting for perfection.

Rafe Sanchez takes the ride of MY life!
And speaking of perfection, former HWOTM and former and long-running overall favorite homoerotic wrestler of mine, Mitch Colby, snaps those tanned, rock hard thighs around the smooth, sexy head of long, long running infatuation of mine (though never a HWOTM), Rafe Sanchez (mmmmmmmm... Rafe).  These two have appeared in some of the over the top sexiest wrestling I've ever enjoyed, so combined, I'm feeling dehydrated just thinking about it.  And I'm not even going to mention the perfection of asses featured in the other two matches on Mat Hunks 9... yet.

Hot, hard muscles turned to jelly.
I will mention that my reigning favorite homoerotic wrestler (non-pornboy) Lon Dumont is also out in a new product, Knock Outs 2 , appearing back in the day when his head was smoother than Rafe Sanchez'.  The match promises both Lon and his opponent, veteran pro Paul Hudson, get sleepered repeatedly, and the image of lovely, powerful Lon so vulnerable, out cold, is giving me hot flashes!

Mr. Joshua had better watch his back (I'll keep an eye on his front for him)
Finally, Ring Hunks 1 (how is this only the first of that title!?) throws former overall favorite homoerotic wrestler Mr. Joshua's massive package headlong into the dangerous machinations of former HWOTM and recent interviewee here, Aryx Quinn.  If anyone can unleash the beast, surely it's diabolical Aryx!   Right?!  Please!?

Another who's got whom from Summer Sizzlers: Wrestle Shack 17... my money is on Dylon Robert's thighs.
So these releases technically fall in the month of May, but there's no way I can assess them in time for tomorrow's crowning of a new HWOTM, so they're officially delayed to join the June releases.  In the mean time, pass me a protein drink.  I'm going in....

4 comments:

  1. Aaaaaaaand I win the over/under on how long it takes Bard to go nuts over Bitch's latest release.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Reading the match description for Skip & Christian's 2-on-1, it looks like they are answering your wish from a previous blog post!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Speaking of answered wishes, when Mitch Colby is always taking up "gut punch challenges", why has BG East never featured him in their "Gut Bash" series? Mitch in a two-on-one would be a nuclear explosion!

    ReplyDelete

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